Do What You LOVE: Part 1 in a Series on ~Manifesting your Deepest Desires via Your Sexual Energy~

Do What You LOVE

Part 1 in a Series on ~Manifesting your Deepest Desires via Your Sexual Energy~

 To start with Passion and Desire in your life is to start from a place of personal fuel.

Our sexual energy is a natural energy outlet that feeds our ideas,

our creativity, our passion, our sexuality, and desires.

It has been denied by institutions for centuries,

yet it is undeniable that it is rising among many who long

for a more real sense of self and sexuality today.

It’s time to reclaim these natural energy outlets that feed our wellbeing of Body, Spirit and Soul.

Our sensuality is a gift, and to live harmoniously with it attracts our true purpose.

Our SENSES are tools

built into our bodies that help us go after what we really love in life.

Our sight, smell, touch, taste, hearing and

our sixth sense of Inner Knowing,

are always there for us.

They let us know when we first meet someone,

if they are a good potential lover or not,

our senses help keep us safe and alert for danger,

and when we are healthy, they also help us attract the perfect partners for us

and help us innately know who is chemically compatible with us or not.

Our pheromones are powerful hormones that affect all of our senses and systems,

and steer our lives in the direction that our heart’s desires want us to go

(as long as we are not on altering chemicals, pharmaceutical or recreational).

 What do you love?

Is it Food? Tennis? Writing? Painting? Plants? Sex? Knitting?

Teaching? Woodworking? Physics? Astrology? Fashion?

Reading? Cars? Tarot? Fishing? Martial Arts? Anthropology…?

Whatever it is that you love, it is there that answers lie.

It is in this place where you find assistance to uncover the manifestation of your deepest desires.

Does it feel crazy to go after your deepest desire?

 Hell yah!

 How do you think I felt when I realized that my

most favorite thing that I loved the most in the world is…

SEX.

That’s right, It’s true.

Along with actually having sex, (which of course, I love),

I love ANYTHING to do with the subject.

I love researching about sexual science,

it’s facts and cultural taboos,

I love talking about sex,

I love sharing with others

the ways I have healed my own sexual traumas,

and what I have learned through Tantra and Sexual Qi.

I love talking about natural birth and the wonderful miracle that it is.

I love seeing others lives change when they find empowerment in their own sexuality,

after taking simple steps and practices in their daily lives.

That places importance on their passions and desires,

as well as getting them in touch with their natural cycles, senses, and bodies.

It brings me Joy to witness others find this freedom.

This is the Revolution I desire.

Often we are taught from childhood on

that we should suppress our natural desires,

to not touch our own bodies when we want to,

to not speak up when we want to,

not to speak our desires

as if they are not as important as

the desires of a figure in authority.

When we are studying Sexual Mastery,

you are REALLY studying the Ultimate in SELF MASTERY,

in all realms of one’s life, not just your genitalia.

This work helps to live your full potential

and allow your desires to speak through you,

igniting the fuel of our passions whatever they may be

in order to access this sacred energy rather than denying it’s existence.

In doing so you actually harness your own personal Power

a way that creates INNER AUTHORITY

rather than consistently denying it

based on outdated religious taboos,

passed on social mores, and mythos that are

        NOT EVEN YOURS,

and therefore never knowing your

       FULLEST POTENTIAL.

This is the difference between feeling dead or alive.

Sometimes, after recovering from negative experiences

in our past histories such as traumas or abuse,

we subconsciously learn from the negative experience,

that since we had bad experiences

we do not deserve pleasurable experiences.

Heartbreaking.

These traumas become imbedded in our cellular memory,

and to release these memories it takes DEEP, INTENTIONAL work.

But SEX is where the fun comes in!

Actually our sexuality and our ideas around money

are DEEPLY related, as sexual energy is actually HOW money comes into our life.

Financial Flow is directly connected to how open and receptive our root chakra is, the place of our Sexual Flow.

F*ck Yeah!

(Don’t worry, you don’t have to have a sexy partner to make the money flow in your life; 

more on how to utilize your sexual energy in the next article)

Orgasms improve your creativity, focus, confidence, and memory.

In fact, sexual energy is creative energy.

Sexual energy accelerates your personal growth.

When you are having lots of sex (with yourself or with a partner)

you just oooze self confidence.

In fact the pheromones that are running through you,

telling others that you’re a super sexy hotty

who just had sex last night, and who can come whenever you damn well please.

This makes you attract others like bees to honey,

men, women, everyone will just want to be around you.

You glow. You radiate. Without having to do much other than walk in a room.

Everyone wants to f*ck you.

(It might take a little getting used to if you don’t usually roll like this,

but I am here to help guide you through this step by step)

Now that’s the Profane side of things,

(which is actually very Holy),

and which our culture is desperately in need of healing it’s ideas around.

I also like to take the Sacred into account when speaking about sexuality,

(which is actually very Profane).

After all, pleasure is the gateway to the Divine.

It’s like a gateway drug, if you can allow it.

It takes a certain amount of surrender and personal work to get to this place,

and once you do, you can never go back to having just boring old sex.

That sweet spot

in between the sacred and the profane

is just too sweet,

too electrifying,

too magnetic and magical

to ever go back to boring sex.

What you are about to embark on

if you choose to keep reading,

and actually delve into your own body and Soul with these practices,

is a sacred and holy Path,

where love and lust co mingle,

that if it gets neglected and underused,

it starts to shrivel up like old, dry, bread,

our health decreases,

and our youthful glow just fizzles out.

That’s right, the lovely package of an Orgasm

is the proverbial fountain of youth.

We were each given this birthright when we were born,

yet, sadly many of us never are taught how to tap into it,

and many never discover it their whole lives.

Sure there’s orgasm, that’s automatic and simple and instant gratification,

but what I’m talking about is learning to channel one’s energy,

circulating it through out one’s body, auric field and out into the world,

while setting one’s INTENTIONS,

accessing your PLEASURE,

and your deepest darkest DESIRES

of your Heart and Soul.

I am here to help you find access to this magnetically charged

fountain of youth orgasmic superpower that you are about to embark on.

It is also your super human Queen/King God/Goddess power

towards manifesting the life of your dreams.

Simply by allowing yourself the gift of Pleasure.

The Gift of You.

And as you get closer and closer to Loving yourself as your own #1 Lover,

you start to do more and more of what you Love,

all the time.

Your life’s Work and Play start to seamlessly blend into one,

Blissful, Ecstatic, Joyful Life.

I’m speaking from personal experience here, this is why I would like to share more with you.

Thank you for taking the time to read, please contact me with any questions,

I offer personal and couples coaching, and circles and playshops on Sacred Sexuality.

Please feel free to share this article with whomever could benefit from it

and sign up for my mailing list to get Part 2 and Part 3 in this Series on:

 Manifesting your Deepest Desires via Reclaiming Your Sexual Energy

Part 2:  Pleasure as a Self Love Practice and Manifestation Tool

Part 3:  Sacred and Sexy Magick with a Partner to Manifest Your Dreams

I am healing my ancestry forwards and backwards in time, proceeding from my root, healing, releasing, reclaiming ancient ties and wisdom.

Today I was blessed by some ancient Chinese medicine and herbalism, acupuncture, cupping, aromatherapy, and more
side by side with my daughter Krimzin who shares
my blood, my gifts, my challenges,
while standing with her own incarnation,
lately, we have been butting heads.

Chinese Medicine and other ancient Wisdom practices say~

Treat the parent, Treat the child and vice versa.

In ancient healing arts that are True
this is the way of discovering both the problems AND solutions
within relational issues,

If you are having challenges with your children at this time,
issues within your households and relational structures,
seek the counsel of wise energy workers and medicine women and men,
for what we are dealing with collectively right now is:

ANCESTRAL

memories gathered at our root,
in our DNA, stored in our cellular tissues for the
right generations to unEarth it,
search it out, send it COMPASSION
heal it and send out the parts that no longer function

on their Merry Fucking way.

My daughter experienced loving compassion and gentleness in a healing space that was so sacred, walked away looking blissed and later experienced some detoxing and knowledge that she said,

"Something had to get out"

We were able to talk and share space in a way that we hadn't been able to
for months. Our inner patriarch was running our relationship HARD, and had to feel and see that both the Maiden and the Matriarch could receive the Nurturer and have safe space too.

Sure we can press on in the wheels of progress
built on caffeine and sugar
rapid, efficient, productive, and successful
RA RA RA ShiSH BoOm BAA

Built on the illusion of.... perfectionism, materialism, industrialness?
Exhaustion to the point of unawareness,
lack of connectedness.

I look at my family,
these precious daughters and wonder,
how would my relationships be if I would have gone further on that route,
that hard road.

As my predecessors~ who grew up on this mentality which

we are ALL now healing from,

here's an excerpt I found upon researching the etymology of the word
"success"...

<<"William James's 1906 speech about the need to find what he titled ''The Moral Equivalent of War.'' His point was that mankind needed a new outlet for combat, and he suggested an ''equivalent discipline'' -- conscription of men into universal nonmilitary service to ''coal and iron mines, to freight trains, to fishing fleets in December, to dishwashing'' -- to ''get the childishness knocked out of them, and to come back into society with healthier and soberer ideas.'' James's purpose, as he wrote to H.G. Wells that year, was to cure ''the moral flabbiness born of the exclusive worship of the bitch-goddess success. That -- with the squalid cash interpretation put on the word success -- is our national disease.''>>

This thinking is what fed our fathers, our grandfathers,
our mothers, our grandmothers,
our governments, our institutions.

Bless them Love them Heal them.

I chose knowing myself.
I chose knowing my daughters.
I choose knowing myself enough to show them a different face of the Goddess than that one which was misnamed and cursed by institutionalized ancestry.

I chose feeling my life apart from history
so I can truly be present here on Earth NOW
to be in service to others.

I choose ways of living, being, working
that relate and cooperate with my playing, healing, living.
In doing so I am teaching my daughters to respect themselves
and find their own truth that feels right to them.

To me that is true success,
let's take a look at the etymology...

success-
(n.) Look up success at Dictionary.com
1530s, "result, outcome," from Latin successus "an advance, a coming up; a good result, happy outcome," noun use of past participle of succedere "come after" (see succeed). Meaning "accomplishment of desired end" (good success) first recorded 1580s. Meaning "a thing or person which succeeds," especially in public, is from 1882

1. English is translated from the same time period when language was being diluted in many forms, not to mention Church and State controlling each other AND the printing presses...(that's a whole nuther rant yet to come...)
2. it has nothing to do with the present moment
3. it is all about accomplishment in the future
4. if we were truly concerned with what's succeeding, would we not put more
TIME, ENERGY, ATTENTION as a WHOLE society on our

CHILDREN?
On the aspect of our INNER CHILD
that has been generationally, systematically,
abused, neglected, controlled, to the point

that we have no idea
how to think for ourselves.

How are you breaking free of conditioning?
Look to your Roots for Answers.

artist unknown, yet loved

Regeneration is Our Natural State

Regeneration of the surface of the uterus is what occurs each month during menstruation.

This is a physiological example of how we as wombyn change and evolve each month with our menses our inner and outer worlds have the capapbility to shift and cleanse quickly due to this natural process.

If we work with these energies and with become aware of the physiological changes in our bodies that occur in this cyclical manner, pay attention to the phases of the Moon in it's course, in relation to astrology and where we are at collectively as well as individually we have great tools and power at our fingertips, flowing from our wombs and through our sisters all around us.

It is a gift to have this knowledge so easily accessible, yet we live in a culture that tore apart our connection with the stars and Moon, took away our connection to a 13 moon calander which made calculation out natural biorythms easy and tapped into that power on a continual reciprocation cyclical way, and it is tie to reclaim this. In recognizing indiginous cultures that our roots are from (we all have this even if not visibly apparent in the color of our skin, we ALL come from tribal, earth based roots)

in paying attention to First Nation struggles and calendars, we move in the direction again of Unity, one with our Earth, one with our Cosmos, one with our Ecosystem.

Black is Back

Well, I started this blog in 2007, and here I am, FINALLY writing again.  Granted, a lot has changed about me and my life in these years past, as it has for many of us the word *TRANSFORMATION* is putting it mildly, but 10 years ago, there’s no way I would have guessed that this is where I was headed.  My Spirit has moved me in infinite measures in my belief systems, living situations, my health & cellular structure, familial orientation, and major career changes have all reciprocatingly taken place to the highest degrees possible for my well being. My Spirit, psyche, physical body have shifted into an entirely new way of Be-ing in which explorations of social standing, familial tribal systems vs. nuclear systems, child rearing within these ideals have been thrown up, examined, turned inside out, shook off, regurgitated and lovingly re-fed to a new baby bird being which I ReBirthed and call my Soul who has proven that Fire is a test karmically that I have become accustomed to, welcomed, and learned in this lifetime to balance with Earth and douse with not too much Water.  

A Goddess who has helped me through all this transformation is a little known Hindu deity: Akhilandeshvari or The Goddess of Never Not Broken. 

She’s not necessarily one who you’d happily bring home to meet your Mom.  A bit of a hot mess, completely uncontrollable, changeable by nature and one that you’ve met in dark alleys,  on the floor at parties, & in emergency rooms.  She’s loved you and then left you, riding off on Her alligator, all in touch with her reptilian self, so much that she RIDES it, blessing it all, the good and the bad while others are left battling theirs with sword and shield.  

I dare say she is the Matron Goddess of our current time, just as once the Virgen de Guadelupe was a healing balm for so many, this fiery Goddess steps it up a few and welcomes the cataclysmic disarray of our heart, the holographic novella of our world, embracing the Earth which is shifting and re-Evolving at such a fast rate within her chaotic embrace.  Akhilandeshvari knows that within the breaking of the structure, if an allowance of flow is accepted, the ride that takes place is a wild initiation that is at times painful and scary, but if we don’t bail too quickly the process is empowering and fantastical, all via good ol’ Pain and Suffering, intermingling to create a heady cocktail with Pleasure and Joy.

As I always say, there’s a fine line between S & M.

And my experiences leading up to my moments of Brokenness have been many in my lifetime often involve family and fate, and in return deeply affected my health since I was very young.  A  deep self hatred ran through my being until just recently where I realized that the sum of these experiences has given me my scope and vision into the Heart of the human race, endless amounts of inspiration to create art, and reignited my passion for Life at each so called terrible turn.  It's in that space of meeting where Akhilandeshvari has shown up, with the ability to find joyfullness within the grief, suffering, lack of control, aftermath, heartbreak, powerlessness, & confusion,

She transforms whatever  is handed to Her into a crystalline Pièce de résistance.

With one foot in this realm and one foot in the Spirit world, she’s a bit ethereal, as that’s where her Magick comes from, that’s the place to BE, otherwise this physical body get’s way too burnt to a crisp, and the Spirit could get lost out there in the ethers all alone, so She spins and weaves her way in and out of both realms, using bits of reality laced with just enough of the ghost world to make it a little thrilling, a little intriguing.  

This lil' lady is so in touch with her trauma and pain as tools that she uses them joyfully and purposefully to attain her own liberation. 

A true Goddess of the Dance knows that without some true sorrow, pain, and darkness, your dance ain’t worth jack shit.

Where would a true performance artist draw inspiration from if she never had to plumb the dark depths of pain?  And just because she’s been there, she’s no victim, nor is she the cause of these disasters unlike Kali the Destroyer, she just uses what she was handed in this life and reCreates it out of the ashes, a true Pheonix welcoming the change.

Indeed, She’s the one who has been with me while I’ve sobbed on the kitchen floor, thrown rocks with fervor into the River, and roared my frustrations into a pillow.  She reminds me of the light which travels through a prism, it’s beauty lies in how it is disseminated, refracted, creating a multifaceted, endlessly beautiful rainbow as long as light is present.  She is the promise of the Magick in those moments of great brokenness, broken heart, body, spirit, whatever it may be, She is the knowledge that:

When you have hit that rock bottom place, you have also hit the proverbial 
"X-marks the spot"

which without a visit first from Kali, you would have never found Akhilandeshvari,
so Jai Kali Ma!

I’ve found this quote by Pema Chodron to really resonate lately:

"We think that the point is to pass the test or overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don’t really get solved. They come together and they fall apart. Then they come together again and fall apart again. It’s just like that. The healing comes from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy."

I am full of gratitude for these moments in the theatre of my reality in which I chose the more difficult road in order to know the Way.  this has allowed me to let go of the word “Trauma” which is used so heavily in therapy and psychology today, and it was one which I  identified with as I was working through my life’s experiences within the realms of modern therapeutic means.  Much “talk therapy” has taken place throughout my life, which has been helpful in certain moments, but my Spirit knew all along that what I really needed was some time in meditation, some good Shamans and healers, Energy work, some Plant, Water and Earth medicine which Colorado has joyously and abundantly given me, and the permission to my Soul to return to my body via the enjoyment of it through dance, yoga, lovemaking, qui gong, and tai chi, healing work....The list continues to grow as I continue to  heal and fall in love with mySelf whom I have only started to get to know and love and become best friends with because of the choice to Unwrap the Gift of Pain, which with the Goddess Akhilandeshvari by my side, it’s not so bad after all.

Stay tuned for further adventures in my healing and explorations in the metaphysical as they intertwine with my Spiritual-reality as it aligns me in manifesting, artmaking, unschooling, natural parenting and more.

Evidence Based Information in Maternity Care

While evidence is the way our society dissects information, categorizes groups of individuals, and compartmentalizes us into more manageable systems it is also a way we accept the continual systemic abuse of women and children within institutionalized systems.

 What is evidence based maternity care?

Using the best, most accurate research about the safety and effectiveness of specific tests, treatments, and other interventions to help guide maternity care decisions, rather than the common assumptions that both lay people and even health professionals have based their beliefs in about birth.

Some widely held beliefs about birth that our society has accepted and are detrimental to the well being of women and children are:

~Birth is a medical event that requires constant monitoring throughout the laboring process.

~Birth is unbearably painful for a woman to handle on her own without the use of drugs and/or interventions.

~Birth is an event in which the baby's well being is more important than the mother's.


Books:

The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth
-Henci Goer

Obstetric Myths Vs. Research Realities
- Henci Goer

Birth, An American Rite of Passage
- Robbie Davis Floyd

Safer Childbirth
-Marjorie Tew

American Way of Birth
-Jessica Mitford

Understanding Diagnostic Tests in the Childbearing Year
-Frye

Home Birth and Alternatives to the Hospital
-Kitzinger

Where to Be Born: The Debate and the Evidence
-Campbell, MacFarlane

Open Season
-Cohen

Take this Book to the Hospital With You
-Inlander

Misconceptions
-Wolfe


Links:
The Cochrane report
Maternity Wise

Why I Make Jewelry

My first experiences with jewelry were when I was a child digging through my mother’s jewelry box fingering her precious pieces that she brought with her from Burma- pieces of her story and my heritage whispered to me by mythical creatures and dancing maidens carved out of ivory, jade, ruby, silver, & gold urging me to try them on and imagine myself as one of those dancing Burmese girls in a tropical place, rather than a mixed race American girl in cold Minnesota. A silver bangle stamped “Siam” on the back with bare breasted dancers on the front told me stories that I had heard,

like the time my aunt had to throw all the jewelry out of an upstairs window into the garden below to keep them from being stolen by thieves who were raiding the home.

And there have been stories of my own that have become interwoven, such as the time

when I was 7 years old, when I wore a gold bracelet that I had snuck out of my mother's jewelry box to school that day. Upon its safe return home and to the dinner table, my parents looked upon my wrist with surprise and alarm as they told me that I had worn a piece of my mother's and my own inheritance to school that day.

 It was not so unheard of in my mother's day and location to wear your inheritance literally on your sleeve as some of my favorite pieces of hers were buttons made of jewels, silver, or gold that she and her sisters shared by sewing onto their garments each time one of them had a particular special occasion.

I carried stories like these with me until I discovered silver smithing in a high school art class, rediscovering it again in college, and after graduating with a fine arts degree I dabbled in various diverse areas, working with fabric arts, photography, costume design for theater, graphic design, advertising, and even children’s art therapy, but always returning to jewelry making.

 Each time I did, it was like opening my mother's jewelry box, like returning home.

After college, I learned much working in multiple custom jewelry shops, doing everything from apprenticing to sales to design, but learning enough to know that

Art jewelry was where my heart was in comparison to mainstream jewelry for the masses.

These experiences have served to inform my work and the themes of my life, but my true inspiration was yet to come, with the passing of my father in 2000, and shortly soon after the birth of my first daughter, and 3 years later the arrival of my second daughter.  Both births were such empowering and transformative birth experiences through which I saw the cycle of life spiraling on urging me to explore the feminine through my work.

A dear friend and midwife of mine inspired me with her own clay female forms (forever thanks to Racha!) and Goddess Bellies were born, along with a strong desire to explore goddess folklore and our mystical connection to the Earth while translating these stories into wearable art.

The female form reveals Herself to me through materials that come from the Earth- metals, clay, gemstones, and as a piece emerges from these substances a sense of balance and well-being gathers within my own soul. I am happy with my work when I can connect with it viscerally, touching it and working on it with all my senses, and when it becomes more than ornament— a piece that carries a symbolism of ancient lore, a vessel glowing from within that might connect one with their own sense of Divine. My artistic vision culminates when a creation of mine becomes a vessel for someone else, a symbol promoting healing, balance and connection to carry meaning for others through this labor we call Life.